


My Secret

by torijohnston



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-30
Updated: 2020-06-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:41:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 7,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23923264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/torijohnston/pseuds/torijohnston
Summary: When Sam gets hurt during ten days of dares, Colby's heart stops and he runs to Sam. In the moments when he's driving around LA, he worries about Sam and realizes his feelings.
Relationships: Colby Brock/Sam Golbach, Sam Golbach/Katrina Stuart
Kudos: 31





	1. The Dare

**Author's Note:**

> some dialogue is from the video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLw_QIybHRs

**Colby's POV**

Today is the first day of ten days of dares and the wheel landed on Sam. Sam has to jump off the roof onto the bean bags. He seems nervous but he agrees to go through with it. I film the dare from the ground. When he jumps, I hold my breath. He lands and lets out of a yell of pain. I run to him to make sure he's okay. He holds his back and groans in pain. 

"Sam, you're okay. You're just winded." 

He continues to groan in pain as I try to calm him down. We help him into the house and to lay down on the couch. I get an ice pack for him. 

"Where does it hurt?" 

"Lower-r back," he says. 

I place the ice back where he directed me to and he sighs in relief. 

He wants to film so I turn on the camera. 

"Are you sure you want to film this?"

"Yeah, I mean. I can move."

**Off Camera**

"Everyone is saying it's good that I can move my fingers and toes. But they also say I should get an X-ray."

"I agree. I'll take you to the hospital." 

Sam can stand upright and walk with support. I help him to the car and he tries to find a position that he can stand to be in. He finally finds a spot that he can stand and I drive to the hospital. 

**On Camera**

Sam is admitted to the hospital but the doctors won't let me film in the hospital and won't let me come in because of COVID-19. 

While I wait for Sam, I drive around LA, thinking. 

_I feel like this is my fault. I could tell he was nervous and I didn't stop the dare._

I stop on the side of the road and put the car in park. 

_I hope he will be okay. If he isn't... I don't what know I would do._ _I start_ to tear up thinking about Sam being hurt. _He's my best friend and if he isn't okay, I don't know if I can forgive myself._

**Sam's POV**

I explain the situation to the camera while waiting for the tests to come back. I also text Kat while I'm waiting. 

**S: hey babe. so I did something dumb.**

**K: what happened? are you okay?**

**S: I jumped off t** **he roof and landed on a bean bag**

**K: Are you hurt??**

**S: my back hurts. Colby took me to the hospital. I'm waiting for the tests to come back.**

**K: let me know. I love you**

**S: I love you too.**

The tests come back and I did break my back. I text Kat an update while I wait for them to get the brace for me. They put the brace on and I sign my release papers. I walk out to the parking lot and see Colby waiting for me. 

"Are you okay?" He asks, the worry clear in his eyes, as soon as I get into the car. 

"So, I did break my back." 

"Oh my god. Are you in pain? What can I do?" 

"I just want to go home and rest." 

"Okay," he says, starting the car. 

He drives us home as carefully as he can. 


	2. Adjusting

**Sam’s POV**

We arrive home fifteen minutes later after spending hours at the hospital. I get out of the car and groan.

“Sam?”

“I’m okay. It just hurts.”

“Do you need help getting inside?” Colby asks.

“Would you mind?” I ask.

“Not at all,” he says, and I lean on him as we walk into the house. “Do you want to go upstairs?”

“I don’t know if I can make it upstairs. Ugh, why does my room have to be upstairs?” I say.

“You can sleep in mine if it’s easier,” he says.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, come on.”

He helps me to his room, and I lay down on my stomach because it hurts less. _Ugh that was such a stupid thing to do._ I notice Colby walk away. _Wait, where is he going? Is he going to leave me alone in here? What if I need help?_

Colby comes back a minute later with an ice pack and a bottle of water. He places the ice pack on my back, and I sigh in relief. He puts the bottle of water next to my medicine on the nightstand. The doctor prescribed some minor pain medication if I need it.

“Do you want some of the medicine?” Colby asks, concern clearly visible on his face.

“No, I’m okay for now. The ice helps. Thanks, Colby.”

“Do you need anything else?”

“I’m really warm. Could you help me?”

He helps me take off my brace and shirt. Then he puts the brace and the ice pack back on. He turns off the light and starts to leave the room.

“Colby?”

He turns back to me, “Yeah, Sam?”

“C-could you stay with me? In case I need something,” I say.

“Sure, Sam.”

**Colby’s POV**

I lay down next to Sam, careful not to move the bed too much because I don’t want to hurt Sam. He turns to face me and says, “Thank you, Colby.”

“Anything for you,” I say.

“You’re so far away,” he says, pouting.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Please.”

I get closer to him and he snuggles into my side. I run my hands through his hair and he drifts off to sleep. I fall asleep shortly after.

I wake up to quiet sniffles coming from beside me. I turn to see tears rolling down Sam’s face.

“Sam?” He cries harder.

“Sam?! What's wrong? Talk to me!”

“It-t hurts-s…”

“Hold on-”

I turn on the light and help Sam to sit up. I grab the medicine and hand it to him. He swallows the medicine. I notice that his ice pack is warm so I go to grab him another one but he stops me.

“D-don’t… don’t leave me…”

“I’m just getting you another ice pack.”

**Sam’s POV**

Colby has been gone for a long while now. _What if he did leave me? I need him… What is happening to me? Why do I keep thinking about these things?_

My thoughts are interrupted by a sudden coldness on my lower back.

“You okay, Sammy?”

I smile at the old nickname, “Y-yeah. I just thought you left me alone.”

“Sorry, Sammy. Jake and Corey were worried about you.”

“It's okay. Just stay with me, please.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he says, laying down beside me and running his fingers through my hair.

“I’m sorry that I woke you….”

“I’d rather you wake me than suffer in pain.”

I nod and start to fall asleep again but I stop myself, afraid that he will leave again.

“I’ll be here when you wake up. Sleep Sammy, you need it to heal.” With that, I drift off to sleep again.

**Morning**

I wake up in Colby’s room with Colby still laying next to me. I sigh, relieved. _He didn’t leave, he stayed all night with me. He is so cute when he’s sleeping- Wait did I just- No, I can't, we’re just friends. This can't be true. I cant-_

“Sam, you’re shivering. Are you cold?”

“What-t? No-o I'm fine.”

He’s sitting up now. “Are you in pain? What can I do?” _He’s worried because of me._

“No, nothing. I’m fine.”

“Sam, I know you. Something’s wrong. Tell me, please. I want to help.”

“You can’t.”

I get out of the bed and ask Jake to help me upstairs. He helps me upstairs and helps me take my brace off so I can change. He leaves the room while I change. He comes back in to help with the brace. After he leaves again, I lock the door and call Kat.

“Morning Sam. How are you feeling?”

“A little sore still. Look, I need to talk to you. Can we meet up?” I say.

“Is everything okay?” 

“I don’t know…”

“I’ll be over soon.”


	3. Breakup

**Chapter 3: Break up**

Ten minutes later, Kat texts me that she’s here.

**Sam: Jake, can you let Kat in?**

**Jake: Sure.**

Kat comes into my room and sits down on my bed with me.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m confused,” I say.

  
“About what?

I sigh then say, “I started having these thoughts last night and this morning. About someone who is a friend, but the thoughts were… not thoughts you would think about a friend…”

“And you’re confused about your feelings about me and Colby?”

I stare at her in shock “What-t?”

“The person you’re talking about is Colby, isn't it?”

“Y-yes. I’m so sorry Kat… I-I don’t know what’s happening to me…”

“I think you’ve liked Colby for a while and you’re just realizing it now.”

“I’m so sorry Kat….”

“Sam, it’s okay. You can’t help how you feel. To be honest, I’ve suspected for a while. And honestly, I do care about you but my feelings have changed.”

“Did-d we just break up?” She nods and I say, “We'll-l still be friends-s right?”

She hugs me lightly and says “Of course.”

“Want to watch something?”

She agrees and I put on a random movie.

_Oh, no. Do I have to tell Colby now? What if he stops talking to me? I can’t lose him._

“Sam, you’re shaking.”

“What if I lose Colby?”

“You won’t. Even if he doesn’t feel the same, which I doubt, he won’t leave you.”


	4. Distance

**Colby’s POV**

Sam has been distant from me these past few days. He isn’t letting me in and I don’t know what to do. Maybe the roommates know something? I head downstairs to talk to Corey and Jake.

“Have you guys talked to Sam?”

“Yeah, why?” Corey asks.

“He’s been distant from me. Do you know anything?” I ask.

“No, I have no idea. Sorry,” Corey says.

“Me either. Maybe Kat does?” Jake says.

“Maybe.” I pull out my phone to text Kat.

**C: Sam’s been distant from me lately, do you know anything?**

**Kat’s POV**

**C: Sam’s been distant from me lately, do you know anything?**

_I guess Sam didn’t talk to him._ I call Sam.

“Hello?”

“Sam, Colby just texted me about you.”

“What about me?”

“He wanted to know if I knew anything about you being distant,” I say.

He doesn’t say anything. “Sam, why have you been avoiding him?”

“Because I can’t face him after realizing what I feel.”

“Sam, he’s worried sick about you. You need to talk to him.”

He hangs up.

**C: Kat, if you know something, please tell me.**

**K: I’m sorry Colby. It’s not my place to say. You need to talk to Sam.**

**C: why should I? He won't talk to me. He leaves the room every time I try.**

**Sam’s POV**

**K: talk to Colby**

**S: I can’t**

**K: he’s your best friend and he needs to know that you’re okay.**

**S: fine.**

I lock my phone and head to Colby’s room. I knock on the door and he opens it right away. His eyes widen as he takes me in.

“Sam? Are you okay? Are you hurt?!”

“I’m okay.”

“Sam, tell me what’s going on! Why have you been avoiding me?”

I sit down and put my head in my hands. Colby sits down next to me and puts a hand on my shoulder.

**Colby’s POV**

“Sam, whatever’s going on, I’m here.”

“Nothing is going on.” 

“Sam, come on. I know something’s bothering you. Tell me.”

“I told you it's nothing.”

He walks out of the room and I follow.

“Sam, this isn’t nothing. Tell me.

“Stop trying to make me tell you!”

“What’s going on?” Jake asks.

“Nothing! Everybody just needs to leave me alone!” Sam says, slowly walking outside because he’s still in the brace.

“Colby, what’s going on?”

“I have no idea….”


	5. Faint

**Colby’s POV**

“Sam! Sam, come back!”

He turns around, “No Colby! Let me be!”

“Sam, talk to me please!”

“Colby, give him space,” Kat says. _When did she get here?!_

“Sam, please. Just talk to me,” I say.

He stumbles outside, and I try to follow him but Kat stops me.

“Colby, look at me,” Kat says.

“What?!”

“Give Sam some space,” she says.

“No, he needs me,” I say.

“Sam needs space to think. Give him that,” she says.

“Let me go to him…”

“Colby, he’ll be okay,” Jake says.

I start to feel dizzy.

“Colby, are you okay?” Corey asks.

“I-I don’t know…”

“Sit down, I’ll get some water,” Kat says.

I put my head in my hands as the dizziness washes over me again. I collapse onto the couch as darkness washes over me.

**Corey’s POV**

“Colby?” I yell, shaking him.

“Corey, what’s wrong?” Jake asks.

“I think Colby fainted,” he says.

“What do we do?” Jake asks.

“He’ll wake up. If not, we’ll take him to the emergency room,” Kat says.

“What’s wrong with Colby?” Sam asks, trembling.

We all jump at the sound of his voice. None of us had heard him come back in.

“Is-s he-e hurt?”

Colby stirs when Sam speaks.

“Sam-m? What-t happened?” he asks.

“You fainted Colby,” Corey says.

**Sam’s POV**

“Colby, are you hurt?” I ask.

“No…”

“You fainted Colby. Are you sure you aren’t hurt?” I ask.

“Sam’s right Colby. People don’t just faint for no reason,” Corey says.

“I know why, okay?!”

He storms to his room and slams his bedroom door.

“W-what does he mean, he knows why?” I ask.

“I don’t know, but you should talk to him,” Corey says, steering me in the direction of Colby’s room.

I sigh then walk to Colby’s room. I knock and then enter the room.

“Colby, what did you mean that you know why?”

“It’s not important,” he says.

I sit down on his bed and say, “It is to me.”

“I just, We weren’t talking and I was upset… I haven’t really been eating.”

“Colby- When was the last time you ate?”

“A few days ago maybe.” 

“Colby-”

“I know, I know… I just, I didn’t want to eat because you were distancing yourself from me. I didn’t have an appetite…”

“Colby, I’m sorry. Things have been crazy lately. I’ve been dealing with stuff. But you need to eat.”

“I don’t know if I can,” he says.

“I understand. But you can’t keep going like this. You’ll get sick,” I say.

“Nice to know you care,” he says.

“I do care. If something happened to you, I-I don’t know what I’d do. Without you, I’d-d-,” I say.

“You have a funny way of showing it. Ignoring me,” he says.

“I just needed some time to figure things out. It wasn’t because I don’t care about you,” I say. “Colby please believe me. I care about you. It’s always been you and me through everything.”

“Sam, I-” He faints again, falling back on the bed.

“Colby! Wake up please!”

Everyone comes running into the room.

“He fainted again?” Kat asks. I nod, shaking. “Did he tell you anything?”

“He hasn’t been eating, because of me. Because I was distancing myself from him. This is all my fault. He thinks I don’t care.”

“Okay, we need to take him to the hospital now,” Corey says.

I nod and Corey picks Colby up to take him out to his car.


	6. Healing

**Colby’s POV**

I wake up hours later with a sharp pain in my left arm and someone gripping my right hand tightly. My eyes feel like lead as I try to open them. I squeeze the hand holding mine.

“Colby?”

That voice forces open my eyes and I see Sam looking down at me, concern flooding his pale face.  
“Are you okay?” Sam asks.

“I-I don’t know. What happened?”

“You fainted again,” he says.

“I’m sorry… I-I screwed up…”

“Colby, no. You’re not well. But this isn’t your fault. It’s mine. I pushed you away,” he says.

“I need you, always. Promise me you won’t do this again,” I say.

“I won’t I promise. I’m here, I’m here for you.”

“Sam, can you-” He cuts me off by hugging me. “Thank-k you, I-”

“Shh, save your breath. I know.”

He holds me until I’m released. They tell me to eat small amounts of food at least three times a day until I can eat full meals. Corey drives us home while Sam holds me in the backseat, running his hands through my hair. I calm down because of his touch and cuddle up to him. When we get home, Sam makes me a small meal. I sit at the counter and stare at the food.

“Colby, I’m here. It’ll be okay. Just try.”

I sigh and pick up the fork. I manage a few bites before shoving the plate away, tears filling my eyes.

“Colby?”

“I’m sorry… I can’t eat anymore…” I start to cry as Sam hugs me, rubbing my back.

“Colbs, it’s okay. Small steps okay?”

“Don’t-t leave me,” I say.

“I promise, I’ll be here through all of this,” he says.

“I need to sleep,” I say.

We walk to my room and I lay down on the bed. He lays down next to me and I fall asleep my arms around him.


	7. Confession

**Sam’s POV**

I sit up suddenly and grown in pain.

“Sam, are you alright?”

“My back, but it’s nothing.”

“Did you take the medicine?” he says.

“It’s upstairs,” I say.

“I’ll get it,” he says, standing up.

“Colby, wait,” I say, grabbing his hand.

“I’m alright Sam. I can walk upstairs,” he says.

He walks out of my room and comes back a few minutes later with the medicine and a bottle of water. He hands them to me, and I swallow the pills, laying back down.

“Sam, why were you distant from me?”

“I-I was going through some stuff. Still am,” I say. ‘

“I could have been there for you. I’ll be here for you,” he says.

“Colby, I think this is something I have to do on my own.”

“Sam, please don’t shut me out. You’re my best friend,” he says.

“I won’t.”

We lay in silence for a while before he says, “How are you feeling? Are you still in pain?”

“I’m fine. The medicine is working. I should be asking you that,” I say.

“I’m- I’m okay. Having you here by my side helps,” he says.

“You need to eat something. I’ll go get something for you.”

“Wait, just stay with me a minute,” he says.

I lay back down beside him, and he curls up to me. He starts to fall asleep and I get up to get some food for him. When I come back, he’s sitting up in bed.

“You didn’t have to do that,” he says.

“I’d do anything for you Colbs.”

“Promise me you’ll never leave me,” he says.

“I swear Colbs.”

He manages to eat a few more bites than he did yesterday and I smile.

“Why are you smiling?”

“It’s progress. And I’m just happy you’re here with me,” I say.

I set the plate aside and he hugs me, clinging tightly to me. I wonder then if I should just tell him how I feel. He falls asleep and I text Kat.

**S: Colby’s okay.**

**K: Good.**

**S: should I tell him?**

**K: do you want to?**

**S: I don’t know. But if I don’t, I don’t know how I can be around him.**

**K: then I think you should.**

**S: maybe you’re right. He’s sleeping right now. Gives me time to think.**

**K: good luck.**

I wake Colby up a few hours later to have him eat something.

“How’s your pain?” he asks, sleepily.

“I’m alright,” I say.

“What’s bothering you?” he asks, setting down his fork.

“I have something to tell you,” I say.

“Okay, what’s up?”

**Colby’s POV**

“Colby, Kat and I broke up.”

“What? Why?”

“Because I have feelings for someone else and so does she,” I say.

“Colby, I have feelings for you.”

“Sam-”

“If you don’t feel the same-”

I cut him off by kissing him lightly.

“Sam, I have feelings for you too, for a while now. I realized it when I brought you to the hospital.”


	8. Waking up with you

**Colby’s POV**

“Sam, I have feelings for you too, for a while now. I realized it when I brought you to the hospital.”

“You-u do?” He asks.

I kiss him again and he kisses back immediately. The kiss starts to get heated, but he pulls away from the kiss when we sit down on the bed.

“Sam, is everything okay?”

“Yes, I just want my back to heal. Like yesterday,” he says.

“Are you in pain? Do you need more medicine or an ice pack? How can I help?”

“I just want to experience everything with you without being in pain,” he says.

“You will. Just give it time,” I say.

I kiss his forehead and help him stand up. He takes my hand and I lace our fingers together.

“So, how about we go out for lunch?”

“I’d love to,” he says.

While he gets dressed in some of my clothes, I head upstairs to grab some clothes for him from his room.

“Ready?” I say, coming back into the room.

“Are those my clothes?”

“I thought you might want some of your clothes,” I say.

“Thanks, Colbs,” he says, kissing me.

I get dressed and we head out to my car. I get Sam situated in the passenger seat then I drive us to the restaurant. Sam and I sit side by side, holding hands under the table while we eat.

**Sam’s POV**

Colby was quiet the whole ride home. He seemed lost in thought. When we got home, he went straight to his room. I follow him worried.

_Colby’s thoughts: **What Sam said, about being in pain; I feel so awful. I should’ve stopped it. I saw that he was scared, and I didn’t stop it.**_

I knock on Colby’s door.

“Colby, are you alright?”

“Come in,” he says.

“Colby, are you okay? You were quiet the whole way home,” I say.

“I was just thinking,” he says.

“About what?”

“Your fall, I should’ve stopped it,” he mumbles.

“Colbs, it’s okay. This isn’t your fault,” I say.

“I just, I hate that you got hurt,” he says.

“I’ll be okay. I’m already starting to heal, and I have you,” I say, hugging him.

“I just don’t want to lose you,” he says.

“Hey, you won’t Colbs,” I say.

I hold him closer and he collapses into my arms.

“I’m sorry Sam,” he says.

“It’s okay, I’m fine. We’re fine,” I say.

**Colby’s POV**

I stare at Sam, wanting to believe him. But I still so feel guilty. Then I feel arms wrap around me and I collapse into that touch.

“I’m sorry Sam,” he says.

“It’s okay, I’m fine,” I say.

“Colby, I love you.”

I sit up and look at him. “R-really?” He nods. “I love you too.”

“This is not your fault. And nothing will change the fact that I love you.” He leans in and captures me in a kiss. I kiss him back still being careful of his back. He pulls away, yawning. I chuckle and lay him down carefully on the bed, pulling a blanket over him. I start to move away from the bed but he reaches for me and pulls me down next to me.

“Stay with me,” he says.

I lay down beside him and fall asleep too.

**Corey’s POV**

Jake and I get home from lunch to find the house seemingly deserted.

“I wonder where Sam and Colby are,” I say.

“I’ll check the backyard,” Jake says.

“I’ll check Colby’s room.”

I head to Colby’s room and open the door slowly. I see Sam and Colby asleep next to each other, Colby’s arms wrapped around Sam. I smile at the sight and head away to find Jake.

“Did you find them?” Jake asks.

“Shh, come here,” I say.

I lead Jake to the door of Colby’s room and he sees them in bed together.

“Aww,” he whispers.

I close the door and head with Jake to the living room.

“Do you think they’re together?” Jake asks.

“I don’t know, maybe. I suppose they could be,” I answer.

“Should we ask them?”

I shake my head, “No, we should let them tell us when they’re ready.”

**Sam’s POV**

I wake up to Colby’s arms wrapped around me and I kiss him awake.

“Hi Sammy,” he mumbles.

“Are you hungry Colbs?”

“A little,” he says.

“Let’s get some food then,” I say, taking his hand.

He intertwines our hands together and we walk downstairs holding hands. Corey and Jake are in the kitchen and Colby quickly releases my hand before they notice. I raise my eyebrows at him but he ignores it. Corey and Jake finish eating and leave the room. I walk over to Colby.

“What’s wrong?” I whisper.

“I just don’t want to be judged,” he whispers back.

“You know they won’t Colby,” I say.

“I’m just not ready for them to know,” he says.

“It’s okay. We don’t have to tell them anything until your ready. I promise Colbs,” I say.

“You’re not mad?”

“Of course not. I don’t want you to feel pressured.”

He hugs me tightly and whispers, “thank you.”

We break apart and sit down to eat. He eats a bite than pushes his plate away.

“Colby?”

“I’m okay.”

“Babe-” I whisper.

“I just- It’s still hard to want to eat. Especially when I’m worried or upset,” he says.

“Hey, one step at a time. We’ll get through this,” I say, reaching for his hand. He lets me take it and I rub the back of his hand soothingly. It seems to calm him down and he is able to finish the small amount of food that I got for him. We finish eating and head outside to hang out with the roommates. Colby and I try to act normal but I can’t help staring at him when I think they aren’t looking.

**Jake’s POV**

Sam and Colby come outside to hang out with us after they eat. They both seem happier but other than that, everything seems normal. Then I notice that Sam is staring at Colby out of the corner of my eye when he thinks none of us are looking. Every once in a while, I see Colby glancing at Sam but looking away quickly. Something is clearly going on. Sam seems at ease but Colby seems nervous. We run out so I offer to get more.

“Colby, could you help me?”

“Sure, man,” he says.

We walk inside together and I ask, “Are you, okay dude?”

“Yeah, why?”

“You seemed a little nervous outside,” I say.

“I just, I have a lot going on right now. Things are complicated,” he says.

“You know you can always talk to me if you need to right?”

“Yeah, I know. Thanks, man,” he says.

We walk back outside with the drinks and Colby heads to sit by the pool, alone.

_That’s weird._

**Sam’s POV**

Colby goes to sit by the pool by himself after going inside with Jake. He seems to want to be alone so I let him be. Corey and Jake go back inside to eat and I approach Colby. 

“Colbs, you okay?”

“I think Jake knows…”

“What makes you think that?”

“He seemed suspicious when he and I were talking…”

“I know you’re worried, but it will be okay. He won’t press,” I say.

“I don’t know,” he says, then walks away.


	9. Safe Haven

****Colby’s POV** **

I head inside.

“Hey Colbs,” Jake says. He sees the look on my face, “Are you okay?”

“I- About earlier. Do you know about me and Sam?”

“Look, I noticed some things. But I won’t pressure you to talk if you aren’t ready.”

****_Trigger warning: panic attack_ ** **

_Crap, he noticed. I can’t, I don’t._

_My breathing picks up and my vision blurs. I hear Jake say something but I don’t register it. Eventually, Sam’s muddled voice reaches me through the panic._

****_“Colbs, you okay?”_ ** **

****_“I think I made him panic,” Jake says._ ** **

****_“Colbs, it’s okay- I'm here.”_ ** **

He wraps his arms around me and rubs my back as he leads me to the couch. We sit down on the couch and he wraps his arms around me. He continues to rub my back until I calm down.

****_panic attack over_ ** **

“Colby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you,” Jake says.

“It’s-s okay. I just, I’m worried about being judged. That’s why I panicked,” I say.

“I would never judge you. I care about you, just the way you are,” Jake says.

“Thanks, Jake.”

“Of course man, whenever you’re ready,” Jake says.

“Thank you, Jake,” Sam says.

Jake leaves me and Sam to talk.

“I’m sorry Sam. I know you must want to go public but I’m just not ready.”

“Hey, it’s okay. We can start with Jake and Corey if that’s easier,” Sam says.

“Maybe, yeah. Do we tell them or?” I ask.

“Well, what do you want to do?” He asks.

“I just want to be normal with you, like a normal couple, in this house. I want this to be our safe haven,” I say.

“Then let’s do that,” he says, kissing me.

I kiss him back and he deepens the kiss. I pull away though, not wanting to hurt him.

“I’m okay Colby. Just kiss me,” he says.

I kiss him and I hear from behind us “Get a room!” Corey yells, chuckling. We break apart and stare at Corey.

“Are you guys together?

Sam looks at me, letting me be the one to tell him if I want to.

“Yes, we are.”

“That’s great!” Corey says.

“You-u think so?” I ask.

“Yes, I do. I’m glad you’re happy. Just don’t be too sappy,” He says, chuckling a little.

“No promises,” Sam says, chucking too and wrapping an arm around me.

I laugh too and snuggle up to Sam who puts a movie on. Corey sits down to watch the movie with us. Jake comes down to join us and I pause the movie. 

“Are you two together?” Jake asks. I nod and he says, “Cool.”

I play the movie, smiling. We all watch the movie in comfortable silence and I relax into Sam’s arms, finally feeling at ease with everything. Sam senses my relaxation and smiles down at me.

****Sam’s POV** **

He whispers in my ear, “Are you feeling better?”

I whisper back, “I’m happy.”

“Good,” he whispers, kissing my cheek.

Corey leaves the room after the movie ends and goes to the kitchen to make dinner. Jake stands up to go help Corey, leaving Colby and me alone.

“I’m so glad they know. I’m relieved. I feel like I can be myself,” Colby says.

“I’m happy,” I say.

“Me too.”

He kisses me first this time and it gets heated very fast.

“Maybe we should go to my room,” he says, winking.

We stumble down the hallway, kissing. He opens the door to his room. He lays me down on the bed gently and turns to lock the door. He lays down beside me and kisses me again. The kiss deepens and his hands run down my body. I moan wanting more of him. He smirks and reaches for my growing boner. He strokes me as I moan into the kiss.

“Take my pants off, please. I want to feel you,” I moan out.

He removes my pants and boxers at once. He wraps his hand around my dick.

“Colby, please-e.”

He stops at once. “What’s wrong?” I ask.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Please, I need more.”

He moves his lips down to my throbbing member and takes me in his mouth. I grip his sheets as he continues to suck me off. I moan, feeling my climax coming.

“Colbs, I’m-”

He pulls off me and strokes me until I come. He falls back on his bed. I smirk, looking down at his boner.

“Your turn,” I say.

I stick my hand in his boxers, rubbing his boner up and down. He groans, gripping the sheets.

“Oh, Sammy.” He comes all over my hand and in his boxers. I remove my hand from his pants. He stands up and takes off his pants and underwear. He grabs a washcloth from his bathroom and cleans us up. He helps me get dressed in some clean clothes before getting dressed. He helps me stand up.


	10. Surprise

**Sam’s POV**

He helps me stand up and he starts to walk to the kitchen.

“Colby, wait…”

“Sam, are you okay?”

“I-I”

“Sam, whatever it is, you can tell me.”

“Don’t leave me.” _It’s not what I wanted to say but I couldn’t bring myself to say the words._

“It’s you and me. Together, forever. I’m not going anywhere.”

I smile, then say, “Let’s go get some food.”

We walk to the kitchen, holding hands. Corey dishes a plate of food for Colby, but I notice that it was too much food for him so I gesture to him and then Colby. He nods and hands the plate to me instead and dishes up a smaller plate for Colby.

“Thanks, Corey. For not giving me too much,” he says.

“Thank Sam for that. He reminded me. I’m sorry that I forgot,” Corey says.

“It’s okay, Corey. I’m not mad,” Colby says.

He squeezes my hand under the counter and smiles at me. Colby goes to use the bathroom after we eat.

“I’m glad you’re happy Sam,” Corey says.

“I’m just glad Colby is okay,” I sigh.

“I’m more than okay, I’m happy. Happier than I have ever been,” Colby says from behind me as he wraps his arms around me. “Thanks to you,” he adds.

“I thought we said no sappy stuff,” Corey says, laughing.

“He brings it out in me,” Colby says, laughing too.

I just stare at them, shaking my head. He sits back down and rests his head on my shoulder. We finish eating and we walk to his room. He hands me a bottle of water and one of the pills.

“Thank you for taking care of me,” I say.

“Of course, I always will.”

He runs his fingers through my hair and I relax into his touch, feeling the meds starting to work. I fight the urge to sleep because I don’t want to take my eyes off him. I stare at him, just taking him in. My eyes start to close but I force them open.

“Sammy, you need to rest.”

“But I just want to stare at you,” I say, pouting.

He chuckles and kisses me. “We have years for that. Sleep babe, I’ll be here.”

He runs his hands through my hair as I drift off to sleep.

**Colby’s POV**

Sam curls up to my side and falls asleep as I run my fingers through his hair.

_I can’t believe he’s all mine. Nothing will ever compare to this._

I hear a soft knock on my door and Kat enters the room.

“Hi Colby. How is he?” She whispers, sitting beside the bed.

“He’s good. Getting better every day,” I whisper back.

“And you?”

“I’m happy. He makes me so happy. But are you alright?”

“I’m glad. And yes, things changed. I’m just glad he’s happy and healthy. You make him happy. He’s loved you for so long,” she says.

“You knew?”

“Yeah, I was the one who told him to tell you,” she says.

“Thank you, Kat. And if you ever need anything, we’ll be here.”

“Colby? Kat? What’s going on?” Sam asks.

“I came to check up on you,” she says.

“I’m great,” he says.

“I heard. Well I have to get going. I’ll see you soon.”

“Bye,” we say together.

“Are you still tired?”

He kisses me, “Definitely not.” 

“Good, because I want to take you out on a date,” I say.

“Really?”

“Yeah, if you’re up for it?” I ask.

“Of course, I would love that!”

“Great, let’s go then,” I say.

He helps me get ready and we walk to his car. He helps me into the car and drives away.

“So where are we going?”

“You’ll see.”

I relax into the passenger seat, just happy to be with him. He drives us to a campground and sets up two chairs by a firepit. He helps me into a chair and starts to set up the tent. When he finishes setting up, he pulls out a bundle of wood and makes a fire. He sits next to me and reaches for my hand. I intertwined my hand with his.


	11. Camping Trip

**Sam’s POV**

“So this was your plan for a date?” I ask.

“Yeah, I wanted us to have some time away, just the two of us. Do you not like it?” He asks.

“I love it,” I say.

He kisses me as the fire burns. We eat dinner and then sit by the fire, holding hands, and talking. When the fire dies down, Colby puts it out and helps me into the tent. He helps me into a pair of pajama pants and one of his t-shirts. He changes too and we lay down on the air mattress he blew up. I lean in and kiss him. He deepens the kiss and pulls me on top of him. I hold him tighter as he runs his tongue along my lip, and I open my mouth for him. He turns us over gently as he hovers over me. His hands hesitate on my pants. I nod, giving him permission.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I’m okay. Just do it,” I say.

He pulls down my pants and boxers as he moves off me and takes off his pants and boxers. He prepares me as I squirm beneath him.

“Am I hurting you?”

I shake my head and he continues. He lines up with my entrance and pushes into me. He goes slowly at first, but I beg him to go faster. He speeds up, still being careful not to hurt me. Moans fill the tent as he moves within me. He finds my prostate and pounds relentlessly into me. Words fail me as I melt into him and the pleasure he’s giving me. I come yelling his name and he releases into me. He pulls out and rolls off me. I cuddle up to him.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m great. I love you,” I say, sleepily. _Oh crap. I didn’t just say that…_

He sits up and stares at me.

“I’m sorry, it just came-” I say.

“I love you too,” he says, kissing me and laying back down beside me.

He cleans us up and pulls a blanket over us. I snuggle up to him and fall asleep.

**Colby’s POV**

Sam falls asleep after telling me he loves me. I smile at him and kiss his forehead, wrapping my arms around him.

Corey texts me

Corey: Sam okay?

**He’s great.**

Corey: Good, have fun 😉

I chuckle and turn my phone off, falling asleep. I wake up to Sam shaking me.

“Babe, what’s wrong?”

“I’m hungry,” he says.

I chuckle and say, “let’s go get food then.”

“But I want to stay in bed with you,” he pouts.

I laugh and say, “All right, I’ll go get some food.”

“Hurry back.”

I quickly dressed and left to get food. When I came back, Sam was asleep again. I shake him awake, “I’ve got food.”

I pass him a sandwich, chips and a drink. He eats hungrily. I laugh sitting down beside him on the bed and start to eat my own food. When we finish eating, his hands start to explore my body. The food wrappers are tossed aside as his hands roam over my body. I moan as his hand reaches my boner. He smirks kissing down my chest.

“Careful Sammy. I don’t want you to be hurt,” I say.

“I’m okay,” he says, kissing down to my boner. His mouth envelops me, and I moan as he bobs up and down on me. I thread my fingers through his hair, and I reach my climax. I come into his mouth and he pulls off me. I stroke his dick until he comes. Then we both collapse on the bed.

“I will never get tired of this,” he says, kissing me.

“Me either.”

I help him dress and we cuddle for the rest of the afternoon.

“Do you want to head home?”

“I’d rather stay here,” he says.

“Okay then. Your wish is my command, love,” I say.

I kiss him and he deepens the kiss.

I pull away, “I have a surprise.”

“What is it?”

I pull out some marshmallows, chocolate and graham crackers.

“Smores?”

I nod and he sits up quickly excitedly then groans.

“Sammy? Are you alright?”

“I sat up too quickly…”

“Hold on.” I find his medicine and I give him some. I rub his back until he seems at ease.

“Better?”

He nods, “Can we have smores now?”

I chuckle and help him out to the fire. He sits down and I start to build up the fire. When it’s hot enough, we make smores and talk.

“Are you having fun Sammy?”

“Yes, I love this. just being here with you,” he says. I kneel in front of him.

“There’s nowhere I’d rather be Sammy. I love you so much.”

“I love you too babe.”

He pulls me close to him and kisses me.


	12. Happy ending

**Colby’s POV**

We make smores and joke around by the fire. Everything feels so right. I’m just happy to be with Sam. I reach for his hand and hold it tightly in my own. He smiles at me and I smile back then kiss him. He kisses me back and attempts to pull me closer to him. I pull him into my lap as the fire burns behind us. It couldn’t be more perfect. He pulls away from the kiss.

“I’m so happy to be here with you,” he says.

“Same love.”

We cuddle for a while before Sam starts shivering. I pick him up and carry him into the tent. I lay him down gently then zip the tent. I place blankets over us and he cuddles up to me. He falls asleep at once and I follow shortly after him.

In the morning, we get dressed and he folds up the chairs while I pack up the tent and other supplies. When we arrive home, I help Sam into the house, and Corey comes out to help me unload the car.

“Thanks, bro,” I say.

“No problem. Did you have fun?” He asks.

“Yeah, it was great,” I say.

We bring the tent and other supplies into the house. Sam is curled up on the couch. I sit down next to him and he curls up to my side. I wrap an arm around him and he smiles at me. I run my fingers through his hair and he relaxes into the touch.

“I love you so much Colbs,” he says.

“I love you too babe,” I say, kissing him. He kisses me back and pulls me closer, wanting more. I pull away and whisper in his ear, “let’s go to my room.”

**Sam’s POV**

We walk down the hall holding hands. I close the door behind us and lock it. He kisses me as soon as he hears the lock click and he guides me back to the bed. Things become heated quickly and our clothes are soon scattered throughout the room. Colby is moving within me again and I’m moaning his name. We finish with moans of each other’s names and he kisses me again. He whispers, “I love you, Sammy.”

“I love you too Colbs. Promise me we’ll always be like this.”

“I promise. I’m not going anywhere.”


End file.
